The Granny review

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Review by Zena S. Dixon

The Granny was directed by Luca Bercovici and released in 1995. With the title of the film, you should know what you’re getting into. The film opens to a medieval exorcism involving a father and daughter. As expected, death makes its appearance in this situation. The daughter quickly manages to wrap her legs around her father’s head, holding him in a leg lock as she squeals, Lick me, lick me down there! I have no teeth down there!” This awesome line partnered music that could have come from a Pee Wee Herman movie. And that, ladies and gentlemen, prepares you for The Granny.

Anastasia “Granny” Gargoli, played by Stella Stevens, is the rich and powerful matriarch of the Gargoli family. Apart from being a huge wrestling fan, Granny has a problem! She is aware of her waning mortality, but that’s the least of her troubles: this Thanksgiving Day permits the arrival of relatives. We are all natives to the feelings of being around family we dislike. Whelp, in Granny’s case, she is completely hated by all of her selfish, money hungry relatives except for her granddaughter, Kelly.

Kelly is the only member in the family who genuinely cares for her Granny and takes care of her all year round. But on this particular day, the other relatives have other desires than the well-being of their dear Granny. They strategize to kill her in anticipation of obtaining their inheritance. Unfortunately, Granny invites the priest from the beginning of the movie and is given the “Qui Chon” magical potion that may make her immortal.

There are three simple rules that the priest gives Granny to follow:

1. The elixir must never be touched by sunlight.

2. Make peace with your family through a cleansing ritual.

3. After taking the potion, you must stay out of the sunlight.

But Granny doesn’t follow the directions, laying the foundation for the awesome horror that happens!

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I’ll stop there to refrain from giving spoilers! Just know, blood and guts flow freely throughout this film! As much as I am a huge fan of blood and gore, this film can be extremely out there at times; it’s very vile. For example, there’s a fur scarf that bites a woman to death, a head is chopped off by scissors, someone’s penis is severed into a relative’s hands and so much more…It’s INSANE!

The director, Luca Bercovici, plays the priest and has a favorite word he uses about two thousand times. I wonder about Mr. Bercovici…like if he fantasizes about incest because this film is full of incest.

Although it’s ridiculous, disgusting and everything gross…I love it! It’s definitely a hidden gem. Yes, it lacked a big budget, but it makes up with such awesome and unique camera work. It definitely caught me off guard, but the 90s, cheese-fest feel is what makes the film great! So, if you’re looking for a good dose of sleaze and campy-humor mixed with horror, give The Granny a try!

I give it 3 out of 5 queen skulls!