Is Anyone There – A Poem by M.C. Adams

I can’t hear anything I can’t hear anyone The silence is not only deadly but deafening I’m screaming for help But no- no one is listening I’m afraid of the blackness Not darkness because that’s just the start of the black First the chill that runs down the spine is clinging to my back like a demon in the night trying to attach its spirit to mine; A shadow always creeping behind every step I take. I fall. Can someone answer the call, the ringing in my ears is too much to bear. I wanna run but I’m scared. My feet are stuck like roots steady trying to uplift the soil sinking around me like quicksand pulling me further and further in. The feeling of loneliness and longing linger in the air like frozen droplets of precipitation surrounding my dispair like looming clouds hanging in the sky which is where I usually turn mine eyes but they are blinded by the nothingness that consumes my every heartbeat. Thumping like a drum my fear quickly becomes this beast that is awaiting to be released. Feeling the red rage take over the monster shows its face but as I look closer its just the reflection of the beast and it is me. My enemy is my friend and my friend is my foe. Woe, is me and the reflection is cast upon a wide lake that I feel is my soul and my inner dark place. The lake begins to rise and the wave hits me in my blindside; blind sided by the crash the climax hits and its choking me now. My airflow is cut off as I gasp for oxygen feeling my heartbeat grow thin but at the same time its racing like a stallion doing the triple crown competition. I gasp once then twice then start to feel my eyes roll back into my head suddenly I’m alone in my room on my bed. The sweat rolls down my back and the chill from the fan creates a whirl wind. Tumbling down the walls to instill within me that I am yet again alone and that triggers me; I hang my head and ask the question once agai why do I have to go through the anxiety that is high? My heartbeat is still thumping and I know its temporary but the pain that lives inside me brings a tear to my eye that I usually hide, but as it slips down my face I wish for a different life, knowing even if it was so it would somehow bite me in the ass, so I take a deep breath and prepare to face the day and try to not show this ugly demon that lives inside of me.